You Can Get Pregnant Over 40 Naturally

You Can Get Pregnant Over 40 Naturally


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Monday, January 22, 2018


Miscarriage Is Not A Blessing

"Something was probably wrong, it was a blessing".
Anyone ever say that to you?

That has to be one of the all time worst things to say to someone after a miscarriage and, yes, it was said to me. What about the lost pregnancy where I had genetic testing on the fetal tissue after a D & C? It was a boy and it was chromosomally normal. The only blessing would have been to have a baby. That statement seems like a nice easy way for others to just sweep this awful messy thing under the rug.

See also: for more on reasons for and prevention of miscarriage

In all fairness, people don't know what to say to others when tragedy strikes. Even after all I've been through, I still struggle to know the right thing to say. I had a friend who I went to high school with whose son recently died in his sleep (he was only 8 years old and the autopsy was inconclusive - he had a diagnosis of autism, but nobody knows why he died). I found myself completely at a loss for
Miscarriage Memorial Necklace, "Until I see you again"

I've come to the conclusion that the best thing people can say is "I'm sorry" perhaps with a sincere offer to help if the person needs it. People who've never struggled with infertility or miscarriage just have no clue what it's like. Many younger people haven't even had to deal with losing a loved one before. This is one reason why I decided to keep much of my struggle with infertility and miscarriage private. Sometimes it's easier to go it alone rather than dealing with the well-meaning condolences that make you feel worse. It's a personal decision on how much information you decide to share with others, but if you do share, maybe it's a good idea to tell people right up front how much you do or do not want to talk about it.

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